Lessons on Self Improvement - Labyrinth and The Power of Friendship Part 1
April 23, 2008 | In Lessons on Self Improvement |
Table of contents for Labyrinth Lessons
- Lessons on Self Improvement - Labyrinth and The Power of Friendship Part 1
- Lessons on Self Improvement - Labyrinth and The Power of Friendship Part 2
- Lessons on Self Improvement - Labyrinth and Personal Responsibility Part 1
- Lessons on Self Improvement - Labyrinth and Personal Responsibility Part 2
The movie Labyrinth is one of my favorites. It came out in 1986 when I was only 10 years old. I’m not sure if I saw it then, or a year to two after, but I’ve loved it since that first viewing.
In case you’re not familiar with the story, let me give you a quick summary. Sarah (played by Jennifer Connelly), who is around 16, lives in her own dream world. When she gets asked to babysit her toddler aged brother, Toby, she calls upon the Goblin King to take her brother far away. Thinking it’s just fantasy, she turns to leave the room and suddenly stops hearing Toby crying. She turns around and finds that the Goblin King (played by David Bowie) *is* real and that he’s just stolen her brother. She asks for him back, but is refused. The Goblin King then gives her 13 hours to navigate her way through the Goblins’ (played by Jim Henson’s Muppets) labyrinth to the castle at the center to rescue Toby. The movie is the story of her journey through the labyrinth.
The last time I watched the movie, I realized there were lots of elements that could apply to self improvement. I paused the DVD, ran and got paper and a pen, and started scribbling down notes. It became clear that one of the main themes of the movie is that Sarah is used to living in her fantasy world where everything goes her way. When she has to navigate the labyrinth, she is confronted with something that she can’t control. As she comes out of her shell, she meets several creatures who become her friends. So, the first set of lessons I picked out of the movie are on friendships.
1. Sometimes we have to fight fear to become friends with someone.The first character that Sarah meets as she approaches the labyrinth is a goblin named Hoggle. He helps her get into the labyrinth then disappears. Sarah meets him again a little later after she gets trapped in the oubliette (”A place you put people to forget about ‘em.”) Throughout the movie, Hoggle appears and then disappears again, popping in to help Sarah and then popping out again.
When Hoggle helps Sarah out of the oubliette, he explains why he disappeared and why he lied to the Goblin King about helping her.
Hoggle says, “You’ve got to understand my position. I’m a coward, and Jareth scares me.”
To be honest, if I had to face the Goblin King every day, I would be scared too. He’s not a nice king, and it’s easy to see why Hoggle is afraid of him. Yet, despite that fear, Hoggle keeps coming back to help Sarah. He can tell when he first meets her that she is nice and they are destined to become friends.
I’ve been friends with a few people over the years where when I first met them, I just knew that they were going to be part of my life. Although, it wasn’t an immediate friendship. Friendships take time to develop, and I had to overcome my fear of rejection to approach them and introduce myself.
One of my best friends, the woman who conducted my wedding ceremony as a matter of fact, I met through the guy she was dating at the time. He was a friend of my brother and she was his girlfriend. So, I knew who she was, but that was about it. To be honest, I thought we had nothing in common. She is a nurse, and I was an insurance agent. Her boyfriend was another person I knew, but not that well. I was hesitant to approach them, figuring that they would just see me as “Brian’s sister” and be no more than polite.
As it turns out, I’m very grateful that I’ve been able to become friends with both of these wonderful people. Both were in my wedding and I see them both regularly. They have become my closest friends aside from my husband and my family.
But, like Hoggle, if I hadn’t overcome my fear, we would not have become friends. Thankfully, what I fear doesn’t have the power to dump me headfirst in the Bog of Eternal Stench (”if you so much as set a foot in the Bog of Stench, you’ll smell bad for the rest of your life. It’ll never wash off.”) However, it does have the power to hold me back from meeting new people - if I let it. We all have to overcome some fear to reach out and get to know someone.
2. Friends can be found in the most unlikely places. On the surface, the labyrinth is dark and foreboding, and all the creatures in it evil and scary. Not so, as Sarah finds out. In fact, most of the creatures she meets are friendly, even though they are in the labyrinth. Early on, shortly after entering the labyrinth, Sarah takes a rest and is greeted by a worm. After they exchange greetings, the worm invites her in for tea. She declines and asks the worm if he knows how to solve the labyrinth. “No, I’m just a worn.” Yet, a worm who invited her in for tea.
After she meets Hoggle, Sarah meets two other creatures who become her friends and travel with her on her journey: Ludo and Sir Didymus. She travels over stone paths, through a hedge maze and even over the Bog of Eternal Stench and in each of these places, she finds someone to help her who becomes her friend.
In my life, I’ve met friends at work, at Girl Scouts, and at restaurants. I’ve met friends on adventure trips and camping trips.
I’ve heard of people meeting in taxi cabs, subway stations, and elevators. When two people connect and realize they have a mutual “like” for each other, the place doesn’t matter. Often, it’s the shared experience that gets them talking initially. This is especially true of adventure trips, like Sarah’s through the labyrinth. The stranger the surroundings, the easier it is to reach out to someone friendly.
3. Not everyone who can be a friend appears that way at first. When Sarah first meets Sir Didymus in the Bog of Eternal Stench, he is guarding the only bridge over a particularly nasty stretch of bog along the trail. He has sworn to protect the bridge with his life and fights them fiercely, not allowing them to cross. Finally, Sarah figures out how to get past him and over the bridge, and Sir Didymus agrees to accompany her on her journey. He puts the same fierce determination that he used to defend the bridge to use defending Sarah. He goes from fighting her to protecting her.
Years ago, I met a girl in Girl Scouts that for some reason, I didn’t connect with at first. A year or so after I met her the first time, we were in the same classes together at school. That time, for another reason, I don’t understand, I could feel that friendship connection. For over 14 years we were friends. And, as I mentioned above, two of my closest friends were simply “my brother’s friends” until I got to know them.
While I’ve never had the experience of becoming friends with someone who I was initially enemies with, I have become friends with people who didn’t appear as friends the first time I met them. Sarah learns too that first impressions aren’t always accurate and are often in need of revision.
Sarah had many adventures in the labyrinth, and there are many lessons I can pull from the movie. Tomorrow, I’ll post the second part of the friendship lessons. I hope you’ll turn in to catch the end.
Do you have any other points to add to the above? Please leave your thoughts and comments below.
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Links to related topics: Being Present, Connecting With Others, Conscious Mind, Do Our Best, Emotional Baggage, Encouragement, Friends, Giving With Passion, Having Fun, Healing Past, Inspiration, Labyrinth, Listening, Mindset, Passions, Paying Attention, Personal Control, Personal Power, Presenting Ourselves, Self Definition, Taking Action, Taking Notice, True Self, Understanding Ourselves
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[…] lovely wife is currently writing a series of blog entries on the self improvement elements of the movie Labyrinth, which you can read by clicking on the link above. While researching for this particular project, […]
Sarah was played by Jennifer Connelly. Love the movie, one of the few with a female protagonist for my daughters.
Doh! Thank you for pointing that out to me. I knew that, but it slipped past my proofreading. I’m going to edit the post so that it reads correctly. Thanks again!